SO I...

so i have pretty much slacked off on doing any type of review for awhile
sorry i promise that i will reup for 2011.....

RED

DOES EVERY GRAPHIC NOVEL NEED A MOVIE NOW??...alright this film is based on yet another DC graphic novel written by Warren Ellis. This film stars Bruce Willis as a ex black ops agent who has to get his old team back together because someone is killing them off one by one..it has a pretty powerful cast which consists of greats like BRUCE WILLIS(DIE HARD, THE KID),MARY LOUISE PARKER(WEEDS), MORGAN FREEMAN(BRUCE ALMIGHTY, ELECTRIC COMPANY), JOHN MALKOVICH(MAN IN THE IRON MASK, BEING JOHN MALKOVICH), HELEN MIRRAM(SHE DOESNT PLAY ANY SORT OF QUEEN IN THIS ONE), CHRIS OWENS(L.O.T.R.,STAR TREK),AND RETIRED ACTOR RICHARD DREYFUSS(JAWS,CLOSE ENCOUNTERS, PIRHANA 3D).
The film is "CUTE" and is aimed mostly for the elder retirees..the jokes are very old man DANNY GLOVERISH TO OLD FOR THIS SHIT LETHAL WEAPON STYLE...if your over the age of 55 this movie is one for you. The action is pretty fast paced but the writing isnt..John Malkovich gives his usual LSD burnout performance ...Willis could just be called John McCLAIN again..and DREYFUSS just needs work...
I did find that every actor in this film has a great new set of porcelain veneers ...which makes for beautiful Chiclets smiles

MCFUNKYFRIED IT 3 OUTTA 5

IF YOU NEED BONDING TIME WITH YOUR RETIRED PARENTS OR IF JACKASS 3D IS SOLD OUT.. GO SEE THIS MOVIE...IF YOUR UNDER THE AGE OF 55 WAIT FOR THE RENTAL..

JACKASS 3D

MONEY WELL SPENT...watching this movie is like going to a high school reunion...seeing the old knuckleheads you trolled around with day in day out for the first time in years..its everything you want from the JACKASS guys..you will cringe in pain, you will gag, and you will laugh your ass off ...also this by far is the best use of the new 3D technology yet..the 3d totally beats AVATAR.. and im not making jokes...im sure there are vaults of takeouts that will keep these guys paid for years..
the film does have some dragging parts but the up parts make up for them..

not much to say about this movie cuz you know exactly what to expect...
go give these guys your money cuz i really don't think theres gonna be to many more JACKASS movies ..times takin its toll

MCFUNKYFRIED IT 4 OUTTA 5 STARS

IF YOUR A JACKASS FAN THIS IS FOR YOU!!!

VIRGINITY HIT

YEAH!!! this movie falls under the "cute" file..its a student film gone good..this film is about four guys that decide they all will celebrate each ones lose of virginity by partying with hits from a sacred bong...three of them lost there v cards except for one goofy kid named Matt who is determined to loose his before its to late..its footage is the stuff that makes being a teenager the best time of your life..crazy parties..crazy antics..and the thought patterns of the idocracy of what is and what was and what will always be..the film is done gorilla style hidden cameras ,running Blair witch camera shots and poor editing..but funny in all the right places and also gives a great message that only the homies can understand...it proves that the woman r correct we men only have our brains in one spot...
Directed by Huck Botko whom is no one ..
the cast is the real kids playing themselves..
please pay close attention to the hotel manager he is absolutely fantastic
the funds for this movie came from Mr. Will Farrell so if that doesn't speak for itself i dont know what does...


MCFUNKYFRIED IT 4 OUTTA 5 STARS
JUST CUZ IT TOOK ME BACK TO THE DAYS I MISS SO MUCH




JUST A CLIP TO SHOW HOW GREAT THE DUMBASSNESS IS

DEVIL

M. Night Shyamalan NEVER FAILS AT ....FAILING...
This movie is another M. Night Shyamalan film that really doesn't live up to the hype...sorry m i think your reign of trickery ended with unbreakable...u have single handily destroyed everything that is good about Hitchcock style film making..sure your scenes of pure darkness with crazy noises were scary but when the lights came back on the scary was gone...the acting was ok but not very impressive..no real actors in this piece because i think Hollywood is finding out M. Night is only making movies because hes using his own money to make them NO MORE MARKIE MARK NO MORE BRUCE WILLIS...the trick is i keep going back to the theater and giving this fool my money...but no more after this i truly boycott M.Night..if this had been a J.J. Abrahms movie it might have actually been scary...there are no tense moments at all (except in the dark)...if you saw the preview then you've seen the movie ...the twist is very predictable ....its lame..i don't even want to finish the review...its pointless....don't go see this movie...wait and rent it at ur local redbox for a buck...or skip it all together...

MCFUNKYFRIED2 GAVE THIS MOVIE

0 OUTTA 5 STARS

PLEASE M.NIGHT STOP MAKING MOVIES...PLEASE

CLICK THE TRAILER BELOW TO SEE THIS ENTIRE MOVIE

MACHETE

This was ......AWESOME...WRITTEN AND DIRECTED BY ROBERT RODRIGUEZ (DESPERADO,FROM DUSK TIL DAWN, SPY KIDS)STARRING........DANNY TREJO(THE BAD ASS MEXICAN GUY WITH REALLY BAD SKIN AND A TATTOO OF SOME LADY ON HIS CHEST...THE ONE THAT HAS KICKED MAJOR ASS IN EVERY MOVIE SINCE 1983) For us film fans we had a taste of Machete a few years back when QUENTIN AND ROBERT brought back olskool grindhouse cinema with DEATH PROOF AND PLANET TERROR...And yes i would have been satisfied paying full price after seeing this movie. Danny Trejo is a bad mutha trucker....still...and this film had a message which was well written into the script the action is intense the acting was actually surprising..just bad enough in all the right places... a fabulous return for Steven Seagal(movies no one cares about any more) as the bad guy. expected cheese but actually got a bad guy performance. But the real prize goes to Don Johnson(MIAMI VICE THE TV SERIES, AND SOME OTHER CRAP) so amazing as the head of border patrol..we also get Robert Deniro(TAXI DRIVER, MEET THE FOOCKERS) giving his usual lazy crooked guy performance, not bad but a bit lazy, you get some Michelle Rodriguez(AVATAR, FAST AND FURIOUS) looking all sexy in her black bra and eye patch shooting everyone, Cheech Marin(REALLY DO I NEED TO LIST HIS MOVIES? DON'T U ALREADY OWN THEM?) as the priest with a lot of weapons, Jeff Fahey(THE LAWNMOWER MAN)and the kid who played Junie in SPY KIDS as a Mexican adopted kid...
oh crap i forgot to mention a semi nude JESSICA ALBA and for the real greasy guys out there a completely nude LYNDSEY LOHAN for 90% of her screen time...i think it was meant to be campy but came off as creepy. i didn't need to see her boobs floppin around all over...that's the little girl from parent trap... come ON man!!! quick scene of some side boobie but not the whole PACKAGE THE WHOLE film...oh sorry ...it just seemed awkward to me.
This movie IS non stop grindhouse style gore and action..sword fights , fist fights, cars, guns, nekkid folks, blood, chaos, crap blowing up everywhere, Danny Trejo.

seriously if you got love for GRINDHOUSE or RODRIGUEZ style cinema this is for sure the film for you...if you are a angry Mexican guy or girl who loved DESPERADO or just is pissed at some white guy for shooting your bother-in-law at the border this film is for you...if yea love watching child stars exploited for a quick buck this film is for you..this movie is crazy messed up ..but extremely entertaining.

MCFUNKYFRIED IT

5 OUTTA 5 STARS ...

YEA 5 OUTTA 5 ITS A BLAST OF A MOVIE...SO EXTREMELY RODRIGUEZ..KEEP MAKING THESE KINDA MOVIES AND ILL KEEP GIVING YOU MY MONEY...

SCOTT PILGRIM VS. THE WORLD

A good friend of mine invented a new word that i believe describes this film perfectly "FUNGAZUM".. This movie is based on the best selling graphic novel SCOTT PILGRIMS PRECIOUS LIFE..it stars the most annoying, lamest, actor of our time..the one dimensional Michael Cera(SUPERBAD, YEAR ONE) and yes he plays the exact role in this movie as he does in ALL his movies but its what he does well...i wasn't impressed by his performance at all cuz it is the same ..its the film making aspect of it all that kicked my ass..its very 1970s style BATMAN special effects ..BAM!!! SMACK!! POW!!..This film also stars Mary Elizabeth Winstead(LIVE FREE DIE HARD,DEATH PROOF), Jason Schwartzman(RUSHMORE,SLACKERS), And Kieran Culkin as the gay roommate which in my eyes acted straighter than the lead straight role....the movie is about a dorky dude in a cool band that falls madly in love with the girl from his dreams but to win her love he must defeat her 7 EX'S.. which happen to be some very fun cameos...the movie is visually stunning and the writing is alot of fun...THIS IS A DATE NITE MOVIE though its Corney in everyway its lovable and will become a instant classic for this generation...

MCFUNKYFRIED IT

4 STARS OUTTA 5

MICHEAL CERA IS STILL A LITTLE BITCH ..BUT HE DOES IT SO WELL.. I STILL HAVE NO LOVE FOR HIM BUT THIS FILM DEFIANTLY LIT A LITTLE FLAME IN MY HEART FOR HIM...

BUT THE SOUNDTRACK ITS GOOD